Mental Preparation for Influencing Under Pressure (The âECOâ Mindset)
If youâve ever walked into a high-stakes conversation with a great plan yet felt your words landed flat, youâre not alone. What we think and feel beforehand shapes what others hear (through our tone, body language, and presence.) Thatâs why mental preparation isnât a ânice to haveâ... itâs a performance edge.
Over the last decade, my work with senior female leaders has shown a consistent pattern: those who prepare their mindset before they prepare their message influence more effectively⌠especially under pressure.
Iâd like to share a simple, research-informed framework you can use right away.Â
The 3 Critical Steps (That We Often Skip)
When influence matters, there are three core steps:Â
- Gain clarity on your message
- Build internal confidence for your message
- Execute an influence framework with the right mental and tactical preparation
Most people skip that third step, and it can be devastating to outcomes with peers, leadership, and customers.
The âECOâ Mindset Model can help you wi...
The Power of Being Afraid - an Interview with Kim Thomas, SVP & CHRO, OneAmerica Financial
In the latest Fearless Female Leadership interview, I had the privilege of speaking with Kim Thomas, Senior Vice President and Chief Human Resource Officer at OneAmerica Financial, about the power of fear and how leaning into discomfort has shaped her extraordinary leadership journey. Kim shared her personal story of growing up with instability at home, which inspired her from a very young age to take control of her future. That determination carried her through college, career uncertainty, leadership challenges, and even personal transitions such as divorce, always guided by her decision to choose courage over comfort.
Kim emphasized that real growth often happens at the edge of fear, and that by saying âyesâ to opportunities (even those that seem intimidating) we develop the skills and confidence needed for long-term success. She also highlighted the importance of writing out a personal and professional vision, staying grounded in values, and taking consistent quiet time to reflect ...
Build Influence Without Being Seen as a Threat (Part 3 of 3): Optimism That Future-Casts a Joint Win
In Parts 1 and 2, we built trust with Strategic Empathy and Curiosity that Creates Trust. Now we complete the ECO Mindset Model with Optimism⌠not Pollyanna positivity, but a clear, credible future-cast that aligns what you want, what they need, and what the organization must achieve.Â
Why Optimism (and What It Is Not).
Optimism is the discipline of communicating a shared vision, better future, and the path to get there. It acknowledges real pressure and loss-pain, but refuses to leave anyone in that valley. Bring them up to a concrete âwhat good looks likeâ vision, so the conversation ends on a crescendo and forward motion.Â
Future-cast the Win (for Them, You, and the Business).
Once youâve validated whatâs at risk, ask: âIf the end of Q4 were a 10/10, what would need to be true?â Then paint the joint outcome: what gets protected, what advances, what success metrics weâll see. This shifts the room from defensiveness to determination.Â
Use âWe/Us/Letâsâ to Create Kinship.
Langua...
Power of Vision During Disruptive Times - an Interview with Kimberly Currier, Global Vice President, Talent Development at AECOM
In the latest Fearless Female Leadership interview, I had the distinct honor of sitting down with Kimberly Currier, Global Vice President of Talent Development at AECOM, about âThe Importance of Vision During Disruptive Times.â
Kimberlyâs story is one of grit, grace, and grounded vision. A former Division I softball player turned global executive, she learned early that success depends not only on skill, but on teamwork, resilience, and self-leadership. These lessons carried her from the softball field to the boardroom, where she now helps leaders navigate change and uncertainty with clarity and compassion.
Through career pivots (from 20 years at the American Cancer Society to corporate roles at Kimberly-Clark and AECOM) Kimberly has shown that growth doesnât always mean âupward.â Sometimes it means stepping sideways or even slowing down to realign with your values and well-being. Her courage was tested in 2020, when the pandemic, organizational change, and serious health challenges ...
Build Influence Without Being Seen as a Threat (Part 2 of 3): Curiosity That Creates Trust
In Part 1 of the "Build Influence Without Being Seen as a Threat" series, we focused on Strategic Empathy⌠leading with what matters most to your stakeholder. Now weâll build on that foundation with Curiosity that Creates Trust: asking brave, compassionate questions that surface pressures, fears, and desires so your ideas land without triggering a threat response.Â
Why Curiosity (and Why Itâs a Little Uncomfortable).
Research and real-world practice point to a hard truth: people are most motivated to act by loss pain⌠what theyâre afraid of losing (visibility, budget, credibility, timeline, even their job). Until we understand that loss pain, and the pressures driving it (our recommendations can miss the mark and even worse, feel like a threat.) Curiosity requires courage because it asks us to name what may be unsaid and then truly listen.Â
Validate Without Agreeing.
Start by acknowledging their reality, clearly and respectfully. Validation isnât capitulation⌠itâs connection. For ...
Build Influence Without Being Seen as a Threat (Part 1 of 3): Strategic Empathy
If youâve ever shared a strong idea and felt the room tense or held back because you "didnât want to step on your bossâs toes," youâre not alone. Your voice matters A LOT, so letâs make sure itâs heard, valued, and respected. This series is doing just that while ensuring you are not held back or blocked by being perceived as a threat: Strategic Empathy.
Why âstrategic empathyâ?
Strategic Empathy isnât just kindness, itâs preparation. It shows you understand and care what matters to the person (their priorities, pressures, and wins). When people feel seen and understood, they feel safe and therefore more open to your ideas, input, and requests. Strategic empathy is the runway to have your influence take off.
Plan as if youâre in their seat.
Before a key conversation, step into their role and ask:
- Whatâs mission-critical for them this quarter?
- Whatâs at risk (budget, headcount, credibility, timeline)?
- What would make this quarter a 10+?
Shape your message to help them win. L...
Seek Yourself Through Service - an Interview with Carrie Davis, Vice President Employee and Patient Experience, Hanger
In the latest Fearless Female Leadership interview, I had the privilege of speaking with Carrie Davis, Vice President of Employee and Patient Experience at Hanger, about her journey and her inspiring message on âSeeking Yourself Through Service.â Carrie shared her deeply personal story of being born with a congenital upper limb difference and how that shaped her resilience, leadership style, and passion for creating belonging.
From hiding her true self as a child to now proudly embracing her identityâeven turning her prosthesis into a sparkling symbol of confidenceâCarrieâs story is a masterclass in authenticity, courage, and servant leadership. She emphasizes that true leadership is not about titles or ego, but about intention, empathy, and lifting others up.
Carrieâs wisdom is a reminder that whether challenges are visible or invisible, we all have the ability to create ourselves, step into courage, and lead with compassion.
đ Key Takeaways from the Interview with Carrie Davis:
-
...
The Resilience Required to Own Your Power - an Interview with Kim Beauvais, EVP, HR & Business Operations, FOX Sports
In the latest Fearless Female Leadership interview, I had the privilege of speaking with Kim Beauvais, Executive Vice President of Human Resources and Business Operations at FOX Sports, about resilience, leadership, and the importance of owning your power.
Kim credits her early upbringingâwhere the word âcanâtâ wasnât allowed in her householdâas a foundation for her mindset. From her time as a Division I soccer player to becoming a senior executive in the male-dominated world of sports, Kim has embodied a âcan doâ philosophy that continues to shape her leadership.
Throughout the conversation, Kim emphasized resilience not as a fixed trait but as a practiceâsomething strengthened over time, much like building physical endurance. She shared candid insights on handling self-doubt, failing forward, and the power of surrounding yourself with a trusted circle of peers who both challenge and uplift you.
Her advice resonates not only for women in media or sports but for all leaders striving...
Get Compensated for What You're Worth (Part 3 of the 3-Part Video Series): "The Power of Practicing Your Ask"
Preparation is powerful. But hereâs the trap I see so many fall into: they spend all their time practicing the âwhyâ behind their ask⌠and almost no time practicing the âwhat.â
When negotiating salary, budget, or new opportunities, leaders will confidently talk about their accomplishments and impact. But when the conversation turns to âSo what are your salary expectations?ââtheir voice changes, their tone drops, and their confidence wavers. Yes, making a bold ask, especially a pecuniary one, is uncomfortable, but it does not have to be!
Here are three ways to sound even more confident making a big ask::
- Say the numberâor the resourceâout loud, multiple times.
- Slow your speaking. Â
- Land the plane. End with a steady, descending tone that conveys confidence (An ascending tone conveys asking permission and uncertainty.).
In order for others to be confident that our âaskâ is a good idea, we must be confident in ourselves first. Remember, the research tells us that only 7% of what ...
Get Compensated for What You're Worth (Part 2 of the 3-Part Video Series): "Turning Resistance Into Your Superpower"
Have you ever noticed that right when youâre about to ask for something importantâlike a raise, more resources, or a new opportunityâresistance shows up?
Maybe itâs worry, fear, or imposter syndrome whispering in your ear. Most of us, understandably, see these emotions as negative. . But what if they were actually superpowers in disguise?
Resistance is often our egoâs way of trying to protect us. But instead of fighting it, you can reframe it into wisdom and fuel.
Hereâs how:
â First, notice the emotion: âI notice I feel worried.â
â Next, assume success is inevitable: âIf I already had the outcome I wanted, what would this emotion advise me to do in order to be my best or improve?
One of my clients used this exact approach in a salary negotiation at a fast-growing startup. By reframing her worry, she did deeper preparation, clearly articulated her value, andâmost importantlyâpositioned herself as the solution to the CEOâs biggest problem.
That shift made her ask not just credible, b...
Check Out My Recent Blog Article / Video / Podcast Posts
Categories
All Categories#executivewomen #influence #fearlessfemaleleadership #ffl1mm #womeninleadership
#fearlessfemaleleader #gratitude #womeninleadership #holidaymessage #sherylkline
#fearlessfemaleleader #newyear2025 #womeninleadership #leadershipimpact #ffl1mm
#fearlessfemaleleaders #beauthentic #careerconversations
#fearlessfemaleleaders #chiefpeopleofficer #servantleadership #womenofinfluence
#fearlessfemaleleaders #ffl1mm #womenwholead
#fearlessfemaleleadership #ffl1mm
#fearlessfemaleleadership #womeninleadership #unlockpotential #boldleadership #ffl1mm #altoslabs
#ffl1mm #fearlessfemaleleaders #womeninleadership #negotiation101
#highstakesnegotiations #csuiteleadership #emotionalagility #fearlessfemaleleaders #ffl1mm
#leadershipadvice #supportsystem #empoweredwomen
#selfcare #ffl1mm #worklifebalance #productivity
